"I don't understand...why do I stress the man? When there's so many bigger things at hand. We could've never had it all...we had to hit a wall...SO THIS IS INEVITABLE WITHDRAWAL."
Thank you Ms. Winehouse. When you go through something foul dealing with a person who is foul, you feel like you're forever changed. I just went through a situation with a person who proved to be VERY foul and it hurt me to my heart. I have so many things that I want to say that my mind doesn't even know where to begin. So in true Chicki Tee style, I can always count on a movie quote or song lyric to sum up what I'm feeling and the above-quoted Amy Winehouse lyric is the cliff note of my thoughts. I just UPGRADED myself and my life, so why stress over someone who is FOUL FOUL FOUL??? The old adage "Fool me once, shame on YOU. Fool me TWICE, shame on ME" is definitely true in this case. I trusted this person years ago, which was to my detriment, as he was a LIAR. Years later, I allowed myself to be convinced and believe that SAID LIAR had changed. That was my bad. I fell for the okey-doke....smh. This situation taught me well. There are some really foul, BLACK-HEARTED individuals walking around out here, and unfortunately you don't always know it until you.get.burned. And I am forever changed indeed. I no longer take people at face value, I no longer give people second chances, and I no longer will allow a person to treat me as an option. And quite honestly, the situation has now put me off of a certain type of man...smh. But I am not bitter. I am not bitter by any means - I am BETTER. I recently upgraded myself, and by extension, my life in general, naturally. I'm getting too old to keep getting "burned", and I have no desire to play with fire EVER.AGAIN. People do not change. Which surprises me that I say that because I've always believed that people can and do change, but sadly, experience has TAUGHT me otherwise. Sure, one can change superficially - they can change their address, their tax bracket, their physical exterior, etc. But WHO THEY ARE AT THEIR CORE will not. That CHARACTER does not change. A leopard cannot change his spots, because HE IS A LEOPARD AND LEOPARDS HAVE SPOTS. It is what it is. I have to give a big THANK YOU to the LIAR who taught me all of this. As Ms. Winehouse so eloquently put it "why do I stress the man when there's so many bigger (AND BETTER) things at hand" ? This is indeed inevitable withdrawal. I can't with you. "We're so over we need a new word for over." (You better say that, Ms. Carrie Bradshaw) if I'm being honest and because I'm not a liar, I will miss you. Today. But tomorrow I won't. Because I'm tired of crying and my tears will have dried by then. And if I'm being REALLY honest - I don't even wish you well. I don't wish ill or harm towards you, but I donot wish you well. It is what it is. Peace.