Am I losing my MOJO??? Nah.

I lost an EBAY auction!!!!  I have never lost an auction in the almost 8 years that I've been on Ebay so I'm kinda pissed.  True, I can just go to any other shoe site online to purchase these very shoes, but the whole thing for me w/ EBAY is the thrill of the auction.  I'm a guerilla bidder from waaay back (giving away all my secrets) and the whole bidding, getting outbid, and bidding again is an adrenaline rush like you wouldn't believe.  It's the little things.....

Anyway, look @ what I lost out on:

So mad right now.  Must not cry....must not cry....

Everyday I'm Hustling...

Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow.  I can't worry about YESTERDAY- what I did yesterday, what I didn't do yesterday - cause YESTERDAY is already gone. Past tense. Today.  I am hustling hard today, working smarter AND harder TODAY so that my TOMORROW will be well worth today's tears, sweat and pain.

I am starting a new business venture.  I am trying something new. And for the first time in a while, I'm stepping out on faith and I'm not even scared.  I'm excited.  Just plain excited. Do you have a dream that you are too afraid to go for or fulfill?  If you have any sort of dream, NOW is the time to wake up and make it happen.  I believe Mariah Carey sang it best back in the day: "If you believe in yourself enough and know what you want, you're gonna make it happen....make it happen."

I'm going for it.

He's Just Not That Into You...

We've all seen the situation before: Girl meets boy. Boy meets girl. Girl likes boy. Boy likes girl. Girl thinks boy is amazing.  Boy thinks girl is...... alright. Just alright. But definitely not amazing.  If the universal law of attraction holds true that "like attracts like" - why would one want to be with an "amazing" person who holds them in less regard? You think HE's amazing, he thinks YOU"RE....ehhh!  ????  Really boo?  That's what you want?  Look, I'm going to tell you something and this might hurt a little bit, but it has to be said:

"He's.Just.Not.That.Into.You."

There. I said it.  There's a reason why they made a movie with that title.  Because it's true.  Believe it. And move on. If you think you're amazing, find someone else who agrees with you. Cause this one does not.

The Revolution Will Not Be Televised

Chip Away - to withdraw or remove gradually

Attack - to start work upon with  purpose and vigor; to take aggressive action against a person (or thing), to undertake a problem or task vigorously

Is there a difference between the two or is it just semantics?  Well, let's illustrate:  We're all familiar with the weight loss program Weight Watchers, right? Weight Watchers is a program that teaches one to eat sensibly, plan meals, count points, yada yada yawn in order to achieve a realistic weight goal. Ok? Ok. NOW,.......ever seen or heard of the tv show "The Biggest Loser"?  This is a program that trains 'contestants' to achieve weight loss by following a low calorie diet & participating in grueling 4-6 hour daily boot camp-type workouts, no matter how outrageous. Two hours of weight training, 2 hours on the treadmill and eliptical machine, and another 2 hours of, say, kayaking in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, just for good measure.

So while both the Weight Watchers and The Biggest Loser programs promise results, the Weight Watchers participant says "I lost 10 pounds in 30 days!"  But the Biggest Loser participant says "Chick Please - I lost 30 pounds in 10 days!!!!"  Semantics you say?  I think not.

You can choose to CHIP AWAY at success, little by little.  You will get to your goal. Eventually.  But the problem with "eventually"  is that "eventually" may never come.  OR...you can choose to ATTACK success.  Go hard.  Hustle hard.  And JUST DO IT.  And success will come a lot quicker than "eventually".

* I can admit I've been "chipping"....what about you?  Do you chip or attack?

The Sideshow FREAK ("Step Right Up!")

Really?  Was an elephant meant to prance around in a tutu for a crowd of jeering children and adults in a daggone circus?  I mean REALLY?  An elephant, like the LION, the BEAR, and all other animals living "under the big-top" were not meant to live in cages and perform "tricks" for humans.  They were meant to live in the wild - in their natural habitat where they can BE an elephant....or a bear....or a lion.

Ever seen a circus lion jump through a flaming hoop? What tha???  Ever wonder how these APEX PREDATORS settle into domesticated bliss so....naturally?  It's due to the process that Ringling Bros. doesn't show you, where they're beating the crap out of the animal, starving him to near death and embarrassing the heck out of him by dressing him IN DRAG and making him coon for an audience.  The poor animal is so stressed and mentally exhausted that he almost forgets that he.is.an.elephant.  Let me be clear: this is not a "Save the Animals" article so you can stop the cheering, PETA. This is not for you.  This is for persons, not unlike myself, who dream of greatness but are dealing with mental stagnancy or too afraid to go after their dreams.  I was am a dreamer.  I was am an artist.  I punch a time-clock, sit behind a computer, and am verbally assaulted by unappreciative "customers" all day long.  And then come home, mentally and physically drained, dreading the next day where I repeat.the.process.all.over.again.  And wait for my "not even a sixteenth of what I'm worth" pittance on Friday.  Let me be clear: I am better than this.  I am better than the job that I have.  I am better than the life that I live.  I am a freaking AFRICAN LION.  I am no longer content jumping through flaming hoops to entertain the crowd.  I was built for abundance, but I have allowed myself to be programmed for poverty.  I am not a circus animal.  I am a freaking AFRICAN ELEPHANT.  I want better so I have to become better.  I want more.  Thus, I will no longer perform for peanuts.

Girl Interrupted....

"IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME - I SHOULDN'T HAVE LEFT YOU".... but I didn't have a strong beat to step to.  Really.  I didn't.  But after a 3-month sabbatical (of sorts) - I am back!!!!  What's been going on with me, you ask?  A WHOLE LOT.....of nothing.  I think the last time we spoke I was trying to get adjusted to the new job while trying to adjust to the demise of a friendship.  While I shall speak of neither, I will say that I am not a person who processes stress well.  I have a tendency to withdraw and go inward, which is why I stopped "blogging".  I became sidetracked, lost focus, and that whole "Mission Upgrade" thing that I'd been working on suddenly became MISSION IMPOSSIBLE and I just couldn't seem to get it together.

But on a brighter note, as they say...A SETBACK is nothing but a SET-UP for a COMEBACK - and BABY I"M BACK!!!!  Back on track with being focused on achieving my goals ("I'm focused man!" - Jay Z) and this time, I'm not just going after them.  I'm going after them hard.  I'm sorry - meant to say HARRRDDD!!!!  A wise man once said "Don't talk about it - BE about it."  And that is exactly my plan. (I'll elaborate later)


* Random question:  Does anyone remember the singer Al B. Sure and his facial caterpillar  unibrow???

A friend brought him up in conversation today - just wondering...

LessThanAMan

I should have seen it coming, I should have freaking known
How could I let you play me, I don't even know
I should have seen it coming down, I guess I should have known
How could I let you play with me, I don't even know

I'm such a fool, I can't believe I let you in my life
You broke the rules but I should have known
You do it all the time

Thought we were cool but then again who am I kidding?
It's every player's favorite crime
To make you feel like it's all real
When it's a LIE and I should have known

I shoud have seen it coming, I should have freaking known
How could I let you play me, I don't even know
I should have seen it coming down, I guess I should have known
How could I let you play with me, I don't even know

I should have known, my family they never did pretend
My mama felt, she never liked you, neither did my friends
And when you blamed it all on me I should have known
That's what LIARS always try to do

It wasn't me, it was you
You're the fool and I should have known

I should have seen it coming, I should have freaking known
How could I let you play me, I don't even know
I should have seen it coming down, I guess I should have known
How could I let you play with me, I don't even know

If your heart was simple just like mine is
Then you would know just how it feels
When someone takes advantage of your kindness
You think you're never gonna heal

If your soul was deep just like mine is
Then you would know not to give up
Keep my faith even through the darkness
Yet I still believe in love, I still believe

                                         - Robyn (Should Have Known)

*** There is nothing like a BAD MAN to bring a woman back to her senses and snap her back to reality.  Ladies please - DO NOT throw your pearls to swine.  Or even worse - to TRASH!!!  It is so not worth it in the end.  When people show you who or what they are, it is definitely in your best interest to believe them.  Never let another person change who you are or you will end up not recognizing the person you have become.  When you first become aware that you are dealing with a BLACK-HEARTED individual, please use caution. (note I did not say "proceed" with caution)  Step away from the fire.  If you can see the flames or smell the smoke, you.are.too.close.  You will get burned.  Lesson learned.  Cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it.  I've already moved on.